dissappoited

he went Taiwan today!!!! 31 Dec then only he'll back!!! oh my god..................10++days we cannot interact..................T~T

feelings

he had promised me before this that wanna sms me everyday. now, he didnt sms me. T~T i thought he just forgot, so i also dont want to sms him, wanna test when did he want to sms me. however, few days later, still dont have any message by him. i cant afford anymore, so i sms him. i asked why he didnt sms me, he just answered me "forgot", "i just think to sms you just now, but its already 1 something, i scare i'll disturb you to sleep", and so on. i had received this kind of answers few times already, he didnt ever take care of my feeling also!! sometimes he will didnt reply me suddenly me when we're sms-ing. we never sms more than 10 messages. i think he didnt like me anymore, so he will forget me, didnt take care of my feelings and treat me perfunctory. T~T i had asked him why he do so, what happened, why didnt him tell me straightly, he will just dont reply sms. the messages that he didnt reply me are more than the messages he replied me. i dont know what happened now. arghhhh!!!!!

Arghhhh!!!

I'm typing the things we did at ziyu's house just now, and suddenly pop out a thing: "Microsoft Word has stop working, restart Microsoft Word?" I thought it will be okay after a while so I just ignored it and clicked to another window and do other thing. I came back after few seconds, THE WHOLE MICROSOFT WORD WINDOW VARNISHED!! So, I went to reopen the files I saved before because I thought what I typed will be there, once open, NOTHING!!!!!!!! Oh my god!!!!!!! I typed very long you know!!!! It just disappeared like that!!!! Uh, I gave up, I just delete the whole files and decided to not to write it anymore. What the hell!!

confession

finally he confess to me. although i considered we're coupling, but i still never accept him properly, or i should say, he never confess to me properly yet. at yesterday 11.11.2010 23.51pm, he confessed to me.

"i have something wanna ask you,"

"what's that?"

"do you like me??
A. yes, i like you
B. i wanna be your girlfriend
C. i wanna be with you
D. all of above" he asked.

"what!? you're so cunning," actually i already choose D once i finished his message. but i'm shy to answer him straight away.

"please answer me properly,"

"E"

"ohh!! i forgot the option E,
E. i like you and i wanna be your girlfriend,"

"you didnt write option E just now!!"

"i forgot it just now."

"so, where are you sincerity?"

"*sincerity* this is my sincerity."

"well, so, *answer* this is my answer."

"ohh, ok. then goodnight." how disappointed am i on that moment u know!!

"huh?? gave up already?? goodnight then." actually i want him to say "no no no!! i wanna know the answer immediately!!".

"i give you some times to consider. tell me the answer tomorrow." this is what he answered.

"ohh, ok. goodnight then."

what the hell is him. actually what the hell am i. i want him to want my answer, but i'm shy to answer him. arghhhhh. what i'm doing now.

well, he sms me few minutes ago.

"what is your answer?"

"E" i decided to tell him now. i scare he'll feel sad because i'm not willing to answer him.

"what is E?"

"its okay if you had forgot it." i know he knew it.

"is that what i sent you yesterday night?"

"what else?"

"can you just tell me you like me? i wanna excited for a while."

"i like you. actually this kind of words should tell each other face to face although i know i will cant say it out on that time." actually i'm dreaming how should i tell him already. haha.


WE TALKED SOMETHING ELSE AFTERWARDS.


but i feel little bit guilty you know. we shouldn't coupling at this age after all. however, i cant control my feeling and i just want to be with him the next second. arghhhh.

boring life

holiday is totally boring, waste time thing. before this, i like holiday very much, i'll appreciate it very much even its only 1day. now, i hate holiday. i dont want holiday. even 1day. i hope tomorrow is school day and i can go to school already. let me tell you how my life boring is.

1. wake up at 12.30pm.

2. go brush teeth, face and then carding my hairs.

3. watch tv until whenever before i have work to do.

4. my turn to use computer.

5. play computer until midnight, sometimes 2am, sometimes 3am, even 4am.

6. go sleep then wake up at 12.30pm the next day and then repeat.

what a boring life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

midnight messages

yesterday, he didnt sms me at normal time. i think he forgot it again, so a bit sad. after played computer, i went into my room to get bed. its about 2am already, and i need to wake up at 7.30am next morning to attend my violin class, i'm so unbelieveable, isn't it?? haha. although its 2am already, but my family still havent sleep yet. yeah, we're owl, i admit. i lay on my bed, and turn my body here and there, cant sleep. 2.26am, a message came. i didnt set my phone to silent mode, so my phone rang loudly. i'm almost sleep already, so i'm lazy to see who sent the message and what is it about. however, i still go to take it, because i thinked maybe its him. look at my phone carefully, its really him!

"sleep already?"

"yeah, why are you not sleep yet?"

"oh. sorry for disturbing you. i dreamed i forgot to sms you today so i sms u now. nothing already, you can go to sleep now."

"really?? ok, then good night." although i'm very sleepy and i gonna wake up early in the morning next day, but i still dont wanna end it.

"of cause its real. good night."

"then i wanna reward you. muack!" this is the first time i do this flirty thing to him, he had did it to me before, but i just haha and didnt reply him same thing. i hesitate very long before i click the "send" button.

"ohh!! you make me cant sleep. so i also want. muack!"

"tomorrow i still need to play violin u know. if i cant play well, u gonna teach me."

"arghhh. i cant effort already, i'm so sleepy."

"ok. then good night."

END. it ended at 3am.

i never think he will still sms me at the midnight. i think he'll forget it or just let it be although he remember it suddenly. a bit touched, haha. however, if its me, i wont sms him. i scare it will disturb him to sleep and i'll explain to him the next day. by the way, i dont care, as long as he has sms me.

he phone me!!

HE PHONE ME JUST NOW!!!! at 00:59 03-Dec-2010
by the way, its not so suprise cause he told me that he have something wanna tell me, want me to phone him, but i refuse him because, this is our first phone call, impossible is girl phone first right~(actually can, but i dont want XD) maybe he take this to ridicule me 1 days. i think he wont do that, but i still dont want. haha

(I TRANSLATE MYSELF, JUST ALMOST THAT MEANING, NOT TOTALLY SAME.)
first call,
"hello," he said.

"hello," i said.

"i hesitate very long whether i should call you or not,"

"because of what?"

"errrrrr,"

"huh?"

"i called you,"

"yeah, i know,"

"so....goodbye,"

"o.....goodbye,"

after that he sms me. he said his heart was bleeding, so he cant continue the call just now. i asked why. he said, its very expensive, his phone gonna no credit already. T~T he reluctant to call me because its very expensive. why he cant just call me because wanna hear my voice no matter how many it charge!? he care it! he could just didnt sms or call me because of it spend a lot. T~T anyway, still feel very happy. i heard his voice!! and i think this is the first time he chat to me about our topic. we never say anything when we meet. just peep at each other and move away our sight when it meet. we had talked, but its just about, when is our class, your book pass already or not and so on, but only few times, not more than 3times. and he said if i'm the one who call him, he'll talk longer. i asked him to wait, and i went to my father's room to take his phone to call him. dont know why, i didnt hear the sound of "du...du...du...", but straight away heard his voice.

"hello,"

"erm,"

"............" we talked something, but i forgot.

"you dont disconnect the call first, i have something gonna show you. dont disconnect it, wait me."

"......................" i just wait him, i thought he'll play songs or sings for me.

after few seconds.......

"your phone has many credit? why you still didnt disconnect the call??"

"you said you wanna show me something then only i didnt disconnect it!"

"i just cheat you. i tought you'll disconnect it. you're so obedient," he was a bit excited.

"well, u asked me not to disconnect it, i'll obey and wont do so," i admitted.

"good then. ok, then i wanna award you something as you're so obedient,"

"what's that??"

"a kiss,"

"what!? who want your kiss. " actually i want it.

"muack. hear it?"

"huh?" i heard it, but not so confirm. i thought its noise.

"muack. can u hear it??"

"oh, ya, i hear it."

"ermm, good. "

"...................." actually i'm very happy on that time.

"do you wanna sleep already?"

"err, not yet,"

"oh, ok,"

"......................"

"why dont you ask me do i wanna sleep already or not?"

"erm......... well, do you wanna sleep already?"

"ya, i wanna sleep already," he laugh.

"ooh, ok, then, goodbye,"

"goodbye,"

after few seconds........

"goodbye,"

"haha. we said a lot of goodbye but still didnt disconnect the call yet." i laughed.

"ok then, goodbye,"

few seconds again...........

"you disconnect it first," i asked him.

"ok, goodbye,"

du...............

the call ended. it spend about 4 minutes.

i dont know why, i have nothing to say. i just wanna hear his voice carefully. however, he also keep quiet when i'm keeping quiet. so our call has many blank time. we both didnt say anything. after few seconds then only he'll say something, but i just answer him with a short answer, cause i wanna hear his voice, if i talk, i cant hear his voice. the call is quite nice, for me, i dont think its so for him, cause i always didnt say anything. anyway, still happy, our FIRST call. XD