Saturday, December 31, 2011

the last day of 2011

Today is the last day of 2011. Thus, I write a post to commemorate it. The most regrettable things in 2011 are my failure to see Charmaine and Charmaine still being single. But I believe that the happiest things in 2012 would be these two things being fulfilled.

Thanks to all of you that love me and make me happy, my life would be colourless without you all! Thanks of all of you that hurt me and I hate, I’ve grown much with your existence. Thanks to my family and my friends, thanks for giving me the precious memories, I will always love you! Thanks to my Charmaine, for being a person that I can give my whole love to her.

I wish I can be more hardworking and better in 2012. I wish I can see Charmaine. I wish Charmaine can find her real love. I wish my family, my friends, my Charmaine and I will always healthy, happy and having luck beside. I wish my family’s economic problem will be much better. I wish I can continue my violin lessons and my skill can improve. I wish everything will be much better.

I wish all my wishes above will come true!!

Last, wish Dameinv Happy Being Wife~~

Tuesday, December 27, 2011


HoHoHo, Merry Christmas~ I know it’s late, anyway, I still have to write it. I wrote all my post late because I was lazy, very lazy to open a Word and type a post. Ha-ha.

Today was my parents’ 22nd Anniversary thus we celebrated it a little bit. Today was dad’s day off of course, we went to market in the morning and I got a set of casual clothes. I don’t get any new year clothes, no ones I liked. I don’t plan to buy many clothes due to my parents’ economic constraint and I would be leaving them in my wardrobe after wearing it once in the New Year. I want to buy dress. And I bought a ballerina few days ago, I love it. I got it once I walked near the shoe-ocean.

We went Penang at the night for dinner and bro wanted to buy an iPad. Is an iPad better than a Canon? I felt that iPad is not so useful for me. But well, it’s useful for him. It took us 3 times longer to reach Penang because it was traffic jam everywhere. Oh damn, it sucked.

We went to a western food restaurant called James Foo. I had a Chicken-Fish combo chop there. The foods were tasty and it’s not so expensive and it doesn’t tax! Everyone looked at us when we stepped in the restaurant, because of bro, because of sis, because of me. It felt so nice, hoho. I was very full as I ate some of my dad’s, mum’s, sis’s and bro’s. Haha.

We went Gurney to buy iPad then. Dad and mum stayed on the car because they couldn’t find a car park and we were lack of time, the shops were going to close. We rushed to the iPad shop and I met Miss Lai. She was there with her family, her sis was so alike with her! Sure she felt we changed a lot when she saw bro’s look, sis’s make-up and high heels look and my dress and high heels look. And still the same, we caught almost everybody’s eyes. Huahaha.

We came out with 2 iPads after teen minutes, one is for my bro’s friend, he asked my bro to help him to buy one. The feeling was so cool. Went into a shop and told the worker that we wanted 2 iPads, paid with credit cards and owned 2 iPads. Wow. But it’s not mine, hmmm.

As I went out, I failed to participant the event held by the Charmaine’s Fans Club Forum. The rewards for this event were so nice!!! But I missed it!! T^T

Oh ya, i got these from my PMR result. I'm not from a rich family, so I already feel thankful for these.

Monday, December 26, 2011

22nd December, result day.

I was taking my result today. I couldn’t sleep yesterday. I slept at 4am and woke up by 6am. I was very nervous. Actually I woke up by 6am to help my mum to pray. It was Winter Solstice Festival. We made TangYuan yesterday and I made 6 special ones, 4 for the alphabets SHEH and 1 for a smiley and 1 for a snowman. J

I went to market before going to school. My sis wanted to buy something. My mum made it late than the time I wanted, actually it was not so late, so I’d given her a bad face. I changed my mood on the way we’re heading to school, I don’t want to take my result with a bad mood.

I saw him at the pondok when our car went into the school. He didn’t look happy, I thought he didn’t get a good result. I didn’t see anyone watching their result slip with smiling face, I thought the result of our year was bad. I was very nervous.

I walked my mum and sis to Dewan Terbuka. Luckily, I saw many people with a bright smile on their face, I felt much better. I thought the list of straight A’s students would be pasted on the board, however, there was no result being announced. We had to take our result like what we did in Konferansi Waris. I couldn’t find Miss Ng thus I asked Fortune.

Our class’s “counter” was empty when I was there. Miss Ng smiled when she saw me. we approached and I read my name out. She got my slip few seconds later. She purposely pulled it out slowly, I held my mum’s finger tightly when I was looking at the slip. My mum urged her and complained that I was going to break her finger. The slip was finally completely pulled out and I saw “AAAAAAAA”. It was STRAIGHT A’S!! I feltt disbelief for few seconds and double checked it. My tears came out uncontrollably once I confirmed that I really got 8A’s. I hugged my mum tightly and she hugged me back tightly too. I cried on her shoulder. MISS NG SAW ALL THESE. I messaged my aunt and Dameinv to tell them this good news and they both congratulated me. Aunt said she would bring me gift when she comes back. HeHe.

Doraemon and her mum came then. I still couldn’t stop my tears. Her mum laughed at me. So what, who cares? It were the tears of happiness, I don’t care to let them out. Dad called mum then and asked about my result. I told him excitedly that I couldn’t finish my sentence well because I’d started crying when I talk about my result. I passed it back to mum and asked her to tell dad. It was Fish’s turn to take her result then. She approached Miss Ng expressionlessly and took her slip expressionlessly and said “thanks” to Miss Ng. Oh my god, so cool. By the way, why was everybody so calm while I was agitated like this? Maybe because my mood was different, I never studied as hard as them. Thus there came the worries.

Nurina came and congratulated Fish and me. Her mother was video recording at the side. She didn’t record my crying part, I’m quite disappointed about that actually. I know it would look ugly but at least I get my precious moment recorded. L

I went to meet Ping after that. I saw her dad, it was the first time I saw her dad. Most of the Chinese went back after taking their result so I couldn’t see many of them there. I saw many of the Indian gangs took photo together with their slips, actually I was quite envy. I wanted to record my important moment too. This was my only regrettable thing I think.

I met Dhar later and she congratulated me too, so did I. I saw him again when we were going out of the school. We both turned and saw each other. We looked at each other for few seconds and I finally swift my sight away expressionlessly. I don’t want to be the one who starts the interactions between us. He’d said that he wants us to be strangers.

We went to Hi-Tech to hand my XueHai papers to Will. He’d given me a notebook of another school, saying that it was his bro’s graduation notebook and it was limited edition, I couldn’t buy outside. I was very confused. Why did he want to give me the book? I don’t need it, I still have many notebooks home. I asked him with phone then and he said it’s the credit for my papers. But I think there was something more.

We went to my dad-side-grandma’s house then and told her and my uncle the good news. They were very happy and proud of me. Uncle called his friends of his unknown group to ask scholarship for me, hope that I can get them. I got nothing when I got straight A’s in my UPSR.

And we went to my mum-side-grandma’s house later and did the same thing. They had the same responses too. Another uncle called and congratulated me. He said I’m the only one who was this clever and he promised that I can ask for anything as long as he can do it. hohoho~ *GRIN* Anyway, I don’t think I would ask anything from him. Bro called and congratulated too. I didn’t ask anything from him, I know he won’t give.

I went Giant with Xiu2, Jo and Jia then. All of us in 3A8 got 8A’s except WHui, YWen and Fang2. Fang2 got A in her Math, wahahaha~~~ It meant our lessons worked!! I was really glad of that. PS: she doesn’t have to stay with Fortune. Haha.

Xiu2 was very happy that she got 8A’s. She paid for us for entertainments and foods. Haha. Thanks ya Xiu2~~~ muack!


Friday, December 16, 2011

just recording and updating

I said to myself that I want to practice violin everyday but I failed again. I maintained it for just 2 days. It’s all because I tore my cocoon on my fingers like a fool and I hurt myself. I couldn’t play violin for few days and I had no time few days after it then until today. And I was lazy today. Damn. I just can’t get rid of my laziness.

They said it would be meteor shower on the midnight of 14th until 15th. I looked at the clock in my computer at the midnight of 13th so it showed as 14th. I thought I’d missed it and I was very disappointed. I realized that only on the next day, my Sina’s friend told me. I went out from my house and checked the sky out yesterday. It was a starry night and the moon was very bright. The sky was so beautiful. I think I saw Orion too because the three stars of his belt were so bright that I could recognized it. I found the vastness of the universe and human insignificance. So I watched the sky for quite some time although I didn’t see any meteor.

When I was looking at somewhere of the sky, I saw a meteor flashed through the sky in front of me!!! I was so excited and touched!! It was the first time I saw a meteor and it was with only my naked eyes!!! It was so unbelievable that I really saw it!!!!! It flashed, it was just a brief moment that I couldn’t remember to make a wish and I wouldn’t be making a wish before it’s gone, I know. I went out a few more times after that and I saw a meteor almost every 5 to 10 minutes I waited outside. I saw a meteor again when I finally remembered to make wish. But I wasn’t paying attention because I’ve been waiting long. I don’t know whether that wish is counted. I just hope that I could make more wish, I need wishes to give me hopes now. I saw a total of 7 meteors.

We will be taking our PMR result on this 22nd. I just don’t dare to expect anything from my result. I’m coward. I would be more disappointed when I expect more. I don’t want that. So I never think of, even estimate, my result now. Everything could happen, there are possibilities everywhere. I will cry if I expect I would get 8As and I don’t get it. Well, I think I will cry too even if I didn’t expect. And I think I will still cry if I get 8As. But it’s the tears of happiness. I hope Dameinv will be there when I’m getting my result so that I can hug her when I get that I got 8As. And she would console me too if I don’t get it. Ha-ha. Anyway, may god bless me.

I don’t know what should I ask from my parents if I get 8As. I used to tell my parents earlier so that they can PROMISE me. Phone? Mine is still so new although it has no wi-fi and not a new model. Computer? I already have a netbook although it’s a cheap one. Violin? I don’t think they afford to buy me a handmade one. Cash? They won’t give me much, don’t waste this good chance. Violin class? Well, they are in economic constraints. Braces? They are in economic constraints. Trips? They are in economic constraints. So actually no matter it’s phone, computer or violin, they are in economic constraints. I don’t want them to be bothered by me especially on the money problem that can’t be simply solved. Maybe I can tell them that I don’t want anything right now but they owe me a thing. I would only be asking for something when they are okay in their economic.

I finally get a big dream for myself. It can be target, aim or something like that, but I know it would only be dream. My perfect and can never be reached dream is, I want to travel to Hong Kong or China, wherever Charmaine is over there and filming, alone! I want to follow Charmaine to wherever she films and stay with her, chat with her, breakfast with her, lunch with her, dinner with her and etc everyday, just like what the other super friend-like fans of Charmaine did and become one of them! Be friends with them and Charmaine too! I must go alone because I won’t be able to do all that if my family is there too. They are impossible to do all that together with me. And I would be fully owning freedom if I do so.

Oh my god, just imagine that, that’s perfect! I could be visiting the places with my friends too when Charmaine’s not free and etc. I don’t need to stay there long cause’ I know I won’t be able to stay long. Few days are already enough for me. At least I experienced that. Maybe I can ask for it when I pass my SPM with flying colours but the main point is, when they afford to do so. I won’t force them for this. I know it’s hard. When they are afford, they just need to provide me 2 flight tickets, clothes(if it’s winter), money for lodging and food. And maybe some pocket money. If the price of everything has already raise, maybe RM1500 for flight tickets, RM1000 for winter clothes, RM1500 for lodging, RM500 for food, RM500 for pocket money, RM5000 in a total. (I counted everything for the most expensive.) My SPM result deserves it I think. Haha.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

much better?

I chatted with Dameinv just now, she said she will be engaging tomorrow and she hopes I will be there. Anyway, she has it in SP, of course I can’t make it. We haven’t gone out yet since she said we will go out anyway before this. What I want now is, we can go out at least once before she becomes PUAN because she won’t be able to go out in anytime once she’s married. And she said she will bring me to her house, I won’t be able to go her house too if she gets married. I wish to go her house before she gets married and sleep there over a night if can. Haha. But I know everything is so difficult as she told me that she might be marrying after few days she engaged. Anyway, she asked me to go her wedding ceremony. J I want to go for sure but can I don’t go alone? I need someone to go with me. L And I thought I can see CheChe there but she has to go Kelantan and she can’t go. Dameinv feels bad about this, of course me too. L

I use about one hour to practice violin everyday.

He never talked to me since holidays started.

Charmaine became the Asian TV Awards Queen yesterday while Kevin became the Asian TV Awards King. I was so happy and excited about this! Their last becoming King and Queen time was in year 2006, five years ago. I was so glad to see them getting prizes together again after five years! Charmaine was perfectly pretty yesterday. I fell into her again. Well, it’s neither the first time I fell into her nor the second but the infinite time. I fell into her every time I see her even it’s just photos. Here they were. Just so love them.

Thursday, December 8, 2011


A great news, I HAVE FINALLY FINISHED MY TWILIGHT! Hahahahahahahaha~~~~ I finished it few days ago and I got the second book, New Moon, today. I was so cool, I used about half of a year to finish a novel. Haha. I’m wondering when will be my day of finishing New Moon. XD

I’ve forgotten if I had already jotted this down: I’d done the first thing in my things-to-do-after-PMR list, go to school without sleeping.

I realized I love Charmaine more and more now. I miss her so much some times. I wished to see her face to face, talk with her, hold her hands and hug her tightly. Maybe I would be lesbian? Haha. Actually I did worry about this before. But I think I’m normal cause’ I like Kevin Cheng too. I will be loving him if he’s not bald now. XD

Charmaine has a lot of news recently. Her updates in her filming period and she went to be her friend, Toby’s bridesmaid. There were so many news and photos I want to follow up, I felt that I was so busy. I wanted to reduce the time of surfing internet now to reduce the electricity fee and I don’t want to spend my whole day on just surfing internet so I would surf at evening or night. There was already much news during that time so I would be very worry that I couldn’t follow all the news and get all the photos. I would still be worrying even after finish following and getting the news and photos. It’s my mental problem I think. Ugh.

I know I should be practicing my PS skills all the time but I’m really lazy. XD But I want to be a PS expert very much because I want to see beautiful Charmaine’s photos come out from me. Actually I’m just lazy to choose photos to be PS-ed and because I was worrying about the above problems too.

I said I want to watch all Charmaine’s dramas in this holiday if I can. But I don’t think I can do it. She has over 40 dramas, I can’t buy because my family is facing money problem, I can’t waste money. I can’t finish them with my super slow internet speed too. I need a long time to load an episode. So conclusion is, I can never do that. Oh gosh, feel so bad about this. L

Charmaine is going to Singapore with Kevin tomorrow for the Asian Award. Kevin and Charmaine will be this year’s Asian TV King and Queen!! Hoho. The main point is, they are going to go together and they will be taking photo together for sure!! Huahahahaha~~~ So eager to see their photos! Alright, I know I’ve already mad. ;P

Ok, back to the real life now. Dameinv is in a relationship. She is coupling. She said they planned to marry soon. Oh my god, it’s just so unacceptable. They just start coupling but they’ve already planned to marry. Well, maybe that’s the culture of Malays but I’m just so worry about it. I’m worrying that she will be cheated by the boy. Anyway, I can’t do anything on it. Perhaps I’m just thinking too much. She’s going to be PUAN soon, feel so berat hati to let her be his. She is his after this.

Part of the reasons Dameinv did tell me a lot of things and made me as her best friend is because she couldn’t keep finding CheChe as she is already married. So, what I’m worrying is, I can’t always find her in the future too because she is already married. L I want to ask for our outgoing day before she get married but she is very busy on her marry things now. L Luckily I haven’t ask yet or she will feel I’m a child and immature, annoying as well.

Maybe I will be liking her less after she get married? Maybe no too because I’m still liking CheChe what XD And she did care of me a lot, unlike CheChe XD

I thought most of the tuition classes will be starting in December so I planned to attend tuition class for all subjects and drop those I think I can handle after school opening. But it’s not so at all, almost all of the class start next year except Modern Math so I changed my mind. I planned to not to attend any tuition class until January and learn all those subjects in school first. February only I attend for those I think it’s hard.

First, it can save money and time, at least for the first month. If I attend all classes means it needs about 400 bucks monthly and I would be very busy. I need to save money now. Second, I can know better that I’m bad in which subject and I can work harder on it. If I attend tuition class from the beginning, I would be counting on it and can’t do well without tuition class.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

New Template!

Finally edit my blog template. I was so lazy to even edit the font of the post before this. It's in an almost-the-same template with Fish's blog now. Hoho. We can be a set of three CUTE bloggers if Suz edits hers too! Huahahahaha XD